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Zingers - Printable Version

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Zingers - jazzboCR - 02-05-2014

1). So Justin Bieber, Katy Perry and Adam Levine walk into a bar; it burns to the ground. It's now safe to turn the radio back on.
2) Note to Black folks: Us Caucs will stop Adam Sandler from making movies if you'll stop Eddie Murphy. Deal?


Zingers - jazzboCR - 09-05-2014

puns:
3 brothers inherit a cattle ranch when their folks die. They rename it "Focus". Reason? It's where the Sun's rays meet.
A Buddhist having a tooth pulled refuses Novocain. Reason: he wanted to transcend dental medication.


Zingers - jazzboCR - 09-05-2014

When Miley Cyrus is naked and licks a hammer, it's "art" and "music"; when I do it, I'm "wasted" and "have to leave the hardware store".


Zingers - jazzboCR - 15-05-2014

Ozzy Osbourne cannot convert part of his English country estate unless he can protect the bats living there, says the County Council.

Talk about Karma.


Zingers - jazzboCR - 16-05-2014

Hendrix didn't need to twerk on stage. He performed the old fashioned way, relying on his musical talents and near-lethal amounts of LSD.


Zingers - jazzboCR - 23-05-2014

It was the busta rhymes...it was the wursta rhymes...


Zingers - jazzboCR - 23-05-2014

I went overseas and got a damaged area on my skin--a fresh foreign lesion.


Zingers - jazzboCR - 27-05-2014

I accidentally kicked the cat off the bed when adjusting the covers. He's now over in a corner sadly humming a Sarah McLachlan song.


Zingers - jazzboCR - 28-05-2014

...Because one Duran just wasn't enough.
Oh and BTW, "racecar" spelled backwards is "racecar".


Zingers - jazzboCR - 31-05-2014

The word "sovereign" is derived from the vulgar Latin word "superanus". That tell you something?